A dirty and stained A4 sheet of paper, printed with purple images and text in a monospaced font, including crossed out spelling mistakes. A logo including a sun, with an ocean wave cresting inside it, in a shape vaguely reminiscent of a tongue ringed by sharp teeth. A large headline reading LAST RESORT NEWS REPORT with the tagline Where Else Would You Want To Go and the date July 31st, with the year obscured by a blotch.
First Column
Headline in all caps: Burning Passion
In our hungover daze last issue, we somehow forgot to mention the winner of the Best Couple prize at our Singles Night! The lucky pair were of course Alice and Rangi, two of our best scouts, whose romance apparently blossomed on the trail!
Our longshanks lovebirds have been hosting nightly campfires in the dining hall, around the stone fire-place, so if you haven’t heard yet, do come along! We’re roasting apples in the fire and singing old songs out of the Singhs’ songbooks, it’s a great way to pass a chilly evening!
Special thanks to Erika, who devised a way to turn sawdust into usable logs for burning, based on an Old World technology. That’s how we do things at the Last Resort!
Plenty of other couples have also been seen canoodling about the resort over the last two weeks, which means you guys are making our job on the social committee – keeping morale high and smiles on faces – way too easy! Not to worry, though, we’re working on lots of ideas to kick things up a notch!
Headline in all caps: Tramping Traders
Our long time trading partners from the north, the Russell Jacks, have sent a runner telling us their annual trading caravan will be arriving next week! They’re coming in force down the old 1 road, so we probably have a big meaty feast coming up! Sharing their kills from along the road is one of the best traditions we share with the Jacks!
Until then, their runner, Nyala Balacha, will be staying with us.
While she’s here, please do your best to make her welcome and show her a good time!
Second Column
The Russell Jacks often trade fruit preserves, and they appreciate honey and liquor, neither of which they’re currently capable of producing themselves.
Other handicrafts might do well – you’ll just have to chance it with individual trades!
Headline in all caps: Nautical Ambitions
Seeing the Otter Destruction at anchor has inspired several of our citizens, including our carpenter, Robbie. He’s organising a sanctioned expedition to Tutukaka, site of an Old World marina, in hopes of salvaging our own sailing vessels – hopefully more than one!
If you’re interested in joining the expedition, apply to Robbie at the workshop. He needs guards, carpenters, any kind of experience with water-craft, and willing hands to do the heavy lifting, and it will all count towards your work budget for the rest of winter!
In the same vein, Erika needs help in the dive shop. Now that we’re seriously working on developing a naval presence, the big tank for the compressed air power storage needs to be moved off the dock! It’s been a convenient place to keep it for years, but it’s never been completely safe and we’ll need the space. A new area on the road outside the dive shop has been prepared, and now we just need some help clearing a path and moving the tank! There’ll be a working bee Monday and Tuesday aimed at that – a great chance to pay off your winning bids at the auction, or just meet your work budget, and afterwards we’ll be having a barbecue on the cleared dock, weather permitting!