A dirty and stained A4 sheet of paper, printed with purple images and text in a monospaced font. A logo including a sun, with an ocean wave cresting inside it, in a shape vaguely reminiscent of a tongue ringed by sharp teeth. A large headline reading Last Resort News Report with the tagline Where Else Would You Want To Go? and the date April 21st, Year 2
First column, headline in all caps: Waveborne Worries
The Aqua Lust has still not returned to her home harbour, and many of us fear for our loved ones out at sea. Be reassured, as we are, that the scouts are still keeping a steady watch on the coast for any sign of them, and it is entirely possible that they’re just fine, docked at one of the islands and doing some simple repairs before they journey home once more!
Headline in all caps: Fully Stocked
Our harvest, which this year was uninterrupted by hungry critters, has filled all our barns and cellars, and a few sacks have already been hung from the rafters of the hall for easy access from the kitchen! Don’t worry, they are securely hooked up there and should be used up within a few weeks!
One thing to remember is that most of our fresh fruit will be made into preserves soon, so if you want a last taste of fresh apples or berries, get out into the orchard! It’s a particularly good way to spend an afternoon off with a loved one!
New column, headline in all caps: Meat Me At The Party
The harvest party is one of our most important traditions as a community, and we never regret a little extra effort to make it that much better. This year, the meat didn’t come to us, so we’ll have to go to the meat! Volunteers are being sought for a hunt beyond the fence. The intent is to kill everything we see, and Gemma is already putting together a smokehouse for all the surplus! Anyone keen to help out is welcome, though of course we especially need crossbow- and BTF-certified party leaders to make sure everyone gets home safe!
Headline in all caps: Spice Of Life
This year’s festival will also be your first chance to try a new treat! Davinder Singh has been carefully tending some chilli plants, a much more potent herb than the mint and thyme we usually cook with! He harvested these odd fruits a few weeks ago, and with Jon’s input has put together a tasty sauce to try out this new ingredient. He will be offering a taste to anyone who wants to try, but be warned – it’s got a kick!