A dirty and stained A4 sheet of paper, printed with purple images and text in a monospaced font. A logo including a sun, with an ocean wave cresting inside it, in a shape vaguely reminiscent of a tongue ringed by sharp teeth. A large headline reading Last Resort News Report with the tagline Where Else Would You Want To Go? and the date December 16th, Year 2.
Body text, headline in all caps: Singalong Sunday
This coming Sunday, the 20th, St Jude’s Church will host an event which we hope will soon be a beloved annual tradition: a carol sing-along and prayer service! This will include a discussion of the Christian roots of Christmas, which is sure to be interesting and educational! Not to mention a chance to sing some beloved seasonal songs with all the people you love! The Singhs are going to be providing a light musical accompaniment, since the church doesn’t have any musicians of its own yet!
St Jude’s is a small group of mostly immigrants from the Duchy, but they will always happily welcome new members who are interested in their religion! The Resort’s freedom of thought has allowed for an exploration of the true form of their ancient faith, so if you’re interested in talking about moral issues, even if you’re not a believer, they’d love to have your input! They meet in Conference Room B each sunday, and there’s always a piping hot pot of herbal tea to share!
New column, headline in all caps: Fresh Hope
In the excitement of the holiday season, don’t lose sight of the work that we still need to do every day! Getting out soon after each summer storm and fixing the trellises for climbing crops is vital for keeping them healthy – and our bellies full! Most important of all, though, is collecting fresh produce for our summer meals. Nothing beats a garden fresh summer salad, except knowing you had a hand in making it happen!
Headline in all caps: Fruits of the Sea
Speaking of making it happen, Captain Debbie needs a few scurvy hands (did we use that right?) to help her gather some delicious seafood for Christmas! Sailing to Russell regularly has allowed her and her crew to explore several rich fishing spots nearby. Paua, scallops, kina and cray all await, but we’ll need a lot of strong swimmers and a few keen-eyed guards to watch for slotters! Pitch in if you can, and help make Christmas delicious!