A dirty and stained A4 sheet of paper, printed with purple images and text in a monospaced font. A logo including a sun, with an ocean wave cresting inside it, in a shape vaguely reminiscent of a tongue ringed by sharp teeth. A large headline reading Last Resort News Report with the tagline Where Else Would You Want To Go and the date January 29th, with the year obscured by a burned area.
Body text, headline in all caps: Stomp Success
Well, you can hang up your big boots for a while, because it looks like we managed to deal with the local infestation of bookworms! Remain vigilant, but with no new sightings for the last few days, we might have at least reduced their numbers so much they’re no longer a threat!
Special thanks and congratulations to young Emma Flynn, who won the Stomp Comp set up by Siri Nordlund with a grand total of seventeen worms! Siri says that the prize wormskin jacket should be ready by the end of Autumn.
Unfortunately, we did lose some volumes from our libraries, but mostly sacrificial paperbacks. If you’ve ever wondered why our library is surrounded by an entire wall of once-popular series, now you know! There was some damage to one of our copies of Pride and Prejudice, but we have four more, so if you’re half way through that book, don’t worry!
Headline in all caps: Storm Excess
The big storm that rolled in from the north last week is a very obvious signal that the summer storms are coming. There was no damage, so far as we can tell, to the crops or to the Resort, but we are probably going to see two or three more before the season passes. Damage should be minimal unless we’re unlucky enough to be hit by the centre of one, but there’s going to be a lot of work to do on keeping drains clear! Also, there will be a meeting this Friday night to discuss wind break designs. Those of us without strong opinions on the matter will have to find somewhere (New column) other than the main dining room to spend our evening. This is long overdue and a valuable meeting to have, but we’ll have a candlelight games night in Cabin 8, just saying!
Headline in all caps: Smooch? Say Yes!
The Old World holiday of Valentimes is nearly upon us once more! Now is the time to start trading for sweet treats and trinkets for your beloved or intended! It’s the best time of year to make your feelings clear – just in time to be very comfortable with each other before the time to snuggle up against the cold is here! Just remember, persistence is a virtue, but there’s no better way to impress your dearest than showing you respect boundaries!
We’ll be having a special picnic in the orchards, weather permitting, for all our lucky celebrants, but don’t worry – if you haven’t paired up, by choice or otherwise, remember that cooking and guard duties during events like this count for triple, so you’ll have an easy, relaxed week at the height of summer as a thank you for helping the rest of us have a wonderful day!
Headline in all caps: Book Note
Finally, a request from the library. If anyone has spare copies of the Fifty Shades or Twilight series being used around the house, they will happily trade them for custom-sized wedges for table legs, holding doors open etc. It’s always a good idea to keep the wall around the library fully maintained!